Heartbeats

 

The Heart beats
the first beat

I turn my clock upside down
wind it to measure infinity

I delve deeper
reach for higher
I laugh and I cry
at my own self
with open eyes, with open heart
embracing my fear

The Heart beats
the second beat

I learn songs
forgotten words
the distant might of my blood

I find the sun within
and friends
on the eve of battle

I find the drum
and its heart
I find the Source
and the sacred flows through me

The Heart beats
the third beat

In the deep dark
of the unknown
in me
there is a light that never dims

The Heart beats.

•   •   •

END OF TRANSMISSION

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On Initiation

Xeper is the mechanism of harnessing your self to serve the timeless Being. Xeper can be a most simple event – common even; yet it is also a direct contact with the most sacred experience of life.

This is what the Initiation is about: sacredness of Being and Doing.

Being in that there is sacredness in you: The core of your self, a seed for more-to-be, a beginning of Will. A sacred heart that is more than and most importantly different from your ordinary humanity. (Or perhaps this is the very definition of humanity at its most potent form.)

Doing in that you can create more that is sacred: First by sacralizing yourself, striving and growing within yourself. This is the function of the Heart. Then by sacralizing the exchange with the outside, opening outwards to life. Active understanding and reciprocally living with your surrounding, trusting that whatever your Will is, you have the right to Act upon it. Only through such actions can the self learn truly more of itself and realize (make real) the Being as a living entity. This is the function of the Magical Link.

Beyond the concept there is the experience. The alignment of Being where boundaries blur and you are at the same time more condensed and separated, and yet more connected, fully intertwined with what is life and what are its possibilities.

The Gift of the Prince of Darkness is the ability to experience the sacred and to engage in the self-creation essential to the sacralization process.

Pyhä luo pyhää.

To remember one’s self

The most profound experience in life is to remember one’s self. To remember that at the very heart of everything that is your self though you might not want to identify with all of it – that is, your body, your thoughts and emotions, your fears and hopes, your social circles and aspirations and pains of the past, your failings and well-farings – in short, the whole book of your life…that at the core of this mess there is something solid, unbreakable and timeless.

To understand this while you still live is to touch the sacred. Everything in your complex self comes to a very different light through such an encounter – the encounter with your own being that is within you and yet grows from something utterly alien to your human nature.

To act upon this understanding and to shape your self so that it resonates with the pulse that flows from your being – that is the most important deed you can do in this life, and that is what you must do unless you want to live a lie.

The next time you look at the stars in their distant light, remind yourself where you come from. When you live remembering the truth of your self, you are already among them.

The Work of the Adept

 

Between the idea
And the reality
Between the motion
And the act
Falls the Shadow

Between the conception
And the creation

Between the potency
And the existence

Falls the Shadow

– T.S. Eliot. The Hollow Men

And so we can see in the Dark of our own Shadows, and Act to the Need of our Creative Aim.

The Book of the Devil

The three cores of Xeper

There are at least three core aspects hidden in the Word of Becoming:

  1. Xeper is an Event. It takes place within clear boundaries in space and time. It is not an ongoing process.
  2. Xeper refines the cognitive narrative. In particular, it is stepping outside of the established story arc. It provides twisting, or even the breaking of the story. It works against stagnated identity and confirmation bias.
  3. Xeper provides a Sacred Experience. The new unfolding of the Being is communicated through the Heart. It gives an insight to a quality that is outside time, but yet manifests through time.

The essence of the Heart

The essence of the Heart is that it is alive and in motion. It pumps the blood, pulsates and beats. It gives the vital rhythm.

There is no immutable absolute truth. There is only the rhythm, the movement, the change, the exchange and the creation.

A note to self

 

A journal entry, 17 August 2016 e.v.

You make mistakes. And from the mistakes, you learn to make things better.

In fact, the only real mistakes are trivial. Everything is part of the puzzle of Becoming.

The past defines you, but it is needless to let it drain your energy. You can let it go. Guilt and regret will not make you better. Think of this day and the possibilities in it, think of tomorrow and the next week. Think of the coming month, and think of the years and decades you may still have ahead. What am I doing today so that it 1) fulfills the potential already here and now, and 2) echoes far into the yet-to-be?

It’s not that you should do more, but that you should weed out the unnecessary and harmful. “Do nothing as much as you can.”

The Work is hard so that you could learn.

Magic and the metaphor of Creation

The Prince of Darkness is not a creator god in the sense of creating the physical world, or – using the terminology of the Temple of Set – the objective universe. The creation of the Prince of Darkness is the individual subjective universe.

The Gift of the Prince of Darkness to the humanity is the possibility to become aware of this. Once you awaken to the creation of the inner universe, and once you have worked through the initial confusion that arises from the awakening, putting forth a considerable amount of work, you see that this creation of the Prince of Darkness was not complete. Rather it was an opening, and once it had been done, the space thus created has been filling up with other influences: external influences from other subjective universes or from the material objective universe, and inner influences of the mechanical nature of your human self.

This is where you are at a crossroads. For another possibility arises: that you can have the same creative power over your inner universe – that in this you are kin to the Prince of Darkness.

Working through the material that has been amassed in your self, exerting the power of creation and destruction according to your needs, desires and curiosity, you will become de facto creator of your universe.

What changes you bring to your inner universe will begin to take form also in the outside objective universe and in the subjective universes of other beings. Part of this process is very natural: as you change and interact with the world around you, those changes will be reflected. But there is a more subtle part, that of your inner core sending out influences that have a more indirect effect. In this you participate in the greater magical current of the world, the real Work of the Prince of Darkness.

The essence of any magical action is to create your own universe, and in so doing you will also help the creation of that which is beyond you.

Notes on the Heart, pt. 2

 

In one’s current state of Work one experiences the Need to Work in some direction. The reason for that Need and direction can be experienced more or less rationally, but the deepest reason for it often stays in Rûna, in the realm of Mystery. Only later when some realizations of one’s Work become crystallized one finds more deeply why one was Working in that direction. The impulse that keep Initiation going forward comes from the Darkness of one’s Being, from ab, one’s Heart. It is suprarational (and “religious” or “spiritual”) in its nature. Once the Need of that impulse is taken under Work one then directs oneself towards it rationally and with magic. In the process also more unconscious layers of one’s mind get involved in it and eventually there may come crystallizations that involve different levels of one’s Being. Then one Knows more deeply what it was that was calling one in the Darkness. At that point the Heart is, of course, already some steps “ahead”, calling deeper into the Darkness of one’s Being.

– Tapio Kotkavuori. Aletheia vol. 1, p. 107.